I guess it’s that time of the semester again–time to freak out. Please, excuse me for this: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHASDFGHJKL;OMGWAT
Last year, my Intro to Media Systems and Processing professor would always keep us students up to date on, well, dates. He’d say things like,
“Hey! Two weeks from tomorrow–SPRING BREAK! And three weeks after you get back, you get to register for classes next semester!”
That’s not exactly what he said (I guess I’m tainting the sacredness that is a quotation–but whatever), in terms of the numbers, but that’s the message he was always reminding us of. This semester, I don’t have that reminding professor, but I figured the time lapse between spring break and the day to register would be the same.
So today, I checked to see if I could start planning course schedules. I tried a couple times a few weeks back, and it was kind of a relief that the Fall 2012 semester wasn’t available yet. But today–today, it was available.
I freaked out to say the least. My heart started pounding as I shakily moved my index finger on the trackpad to check what classes I needed to register for and how many credits I needed for my majors.
Some classes are “open to juniors and seniors only.” I’ve naturally been ignoring those for the past three semesters, but it hit me today–next year, those classes will be available to me because I won’t be a sophomore anymore. I’ll be a junior next semester, God-willing.
AND THAT FREAKS ME OUT.
Because after junior year is senior year, and at the end of senior year (where some of my friends are at right now) is graduation. STINKING GRADUATION FROM COLLEGE. You know what’s after that? Real. Life.
If the next three and a half semesters go by as quickly as the past three and a half, I don’t know what I will do with myself. I hate how time flies. Time shouldn’t fly when you’re having fun because then the fun passes by quicker. Time should go by really slow when fun is being had because then it’s as if the fun is never-ending.
I want the fun times to last forever, not fly by. Not that life after college is the Death of All Things Fun or something, but I’m having fun in the Right Now. And I want to stay in the Right Now forever.
I like to believe that I will get over this anxiety soon, in an attempt to keep my head on straight. I mean, I’ve always felt like this–when I was in ninth grade observing the eleventh graders studying their physics book, I thought to myself, “Wow, I’m glad I’m not them. I’ll never be able to do that.”
I also never imagined I would be able to drive home all by myself in the dark from college like my older siblings did.
But I did do it. I passed that class. And the class after that. And I passed my classes during my first three and a half semesters at college from which I drove myself back home in the dark.
No matter how nervous I get, I know that:
“God does not impose upon any soul a duty but to the extent of its ability” (Qur’an 02:286).
Alhamdulillah. He’s gotten me this far, after all.